So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
ugly people sure do ruin things
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
