I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
