i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
