just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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