Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
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