Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I'm passing your future prison.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Slut skills are useful in every country.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
