Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
my god I love twenty year old dicks
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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