Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
