When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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