one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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