Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
