Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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