Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Did you just see the Batmobile???
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
