we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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