It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
