Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Randomize
