Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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