you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Randomize
