Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
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