Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Michael Bay diarrhea
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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