put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
