next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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