Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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