but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
