There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
pray to the hookup gods
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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