why didn't you poke me back
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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