just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Randomize
