so that wasnt chicken after all
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Randomize
