gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
