I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
either way he was missing a nipple.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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