he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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