trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
