He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
