You're completely useless in the revolution.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Randomize
