The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
