Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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