he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
