So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
