shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Randomize