apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Randomize