I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
