i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize