Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Randomize