would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
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