My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
