Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
