Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
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