Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Randomize
