remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
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