That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
